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Friday, November 16, 2007
Chances Getting Slimmer

Part 1

For those that had been following the saga episode.
This is a continuation of the saga.

I had mentioned before that I was offered a new post.
But then was stopped from going over for some reasons given.
For as long as the position stays open I still stand a chance.
It's almost six month up for the promise given by them.
The promise was to release me for the post if it still stay open.

The trick now is that they knew the six months is almost up.
Recruitment for that position had been filled recently.
So my chance of getting into that post is going from hopeful to despair now.
This is the dirty trick they had pulled a fast one on me right now.
Just wanted me to remain where I'm.

Anyway.... I'm starting to loose interest in this company.
I am seeing a very bad press of management style and human relation.
First they hold my transfer (aka promotion).
Next they trick me into accepting the promise (aka empty).
Now that our bonus is at stake....
I just wonder what would they think of next?
Why work hard for nothing in the end?
My heart just sank very deeply....very deeply....and getting very tired....
Probably it's time for me to rethink of going for a hiatus again.
Or probably it's time for me to move out of this comfort zone.
Go to a no man land and start my life all over again.
I don't mind tilling the land, run the animals, read all the books I have....
Sit by the sea-shore, catch the breeze, laze under the morning sun....
This is the life I have wanted.
When will I be able to have this kinda life?

Part 2

Happen to read this email from Kris while writing this blog entry.

BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his
home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home and committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones and hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference
between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.


"Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One"    

"
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away "

I believed I had been patience enough to hold their promise.
I have been more than forgiving in any manner toward them.
I have never given up my search for a better life.
I'm for sure that I'll find it one day. When? I don't know....
This half years have taken many moments of my breath away.
For I patiently hoping for this moment to materialise my dream.
In the end my dream looks like it's gonna be shattered again soon.
My feeling and desire is all broken down to ashes now..........
Sometime I just wonder does or will my patience pays off???



Posted at 2:51:05 am by chatpolka
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Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Free (解脱)

Received a call from Agnes about Uncle Yong's father.
Was told that Uncle Yong's father passed away peacefully last night.
May he be blessed to return to his Lord for a peaceful journey from now on.

Believe that his passing on is a way to free from the suffering.
Uncle Yong's father had been ill for quite sometime and required closed attention.
Which I think it's the most demanding thing for either party
And of which I've also gone through at one time.
I can understand the kinda feeling.
Especially when every little details need attention.
It is very exhaustive on the one taking care of them.
Not that one cannot do it.
But it's the psychological and physical constraint one has.
At time one can just feel very drain out when no one is there to support you.
Just feel like giving up.
On the other hand, equally for the patient.
I believe they equally would feel emotionally bad as well.
If they know well what's happening or what he/she is going through.

So I believe it's a way out for both Uncle Yong and his father.
Both will be free from the psychological and physical strains.
They can get on with their "life" from here on.
I would love to see myself passed on peacefully too when I am old.
Do not want to cause any misery or burden for any of my love one.
This would just be fair for my love one as they have their own life.
For as long as our love one live in our heart when they are gone.
We continue to love them like we have when they are around.
I strongly believe that this love will keep us alive.

The Eagles - Love Will Keep Us Alive

I was standing
All alone against the world outside
You were searching
For a place to hide
Lost and lonely
Now you've given me the will to survive
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive
Don't you worry
Sometimes you've just gotta let it ride
The world is changing
Right before your eyes
Now I've found you
There's no more emptiness inside
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive
I would die for you
Climb the highest mountain
Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't do
Now I've found you
There's no more emptiness inside
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive
I would die for you
Climb the highest mountain
Baby, there's nothing I wouldn't do
I was standing
All alone against the world outside
You were searching
For a place to hide
Lost and lonely
Now you've given me the will to survive
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive
When we're hungry...love will keep us alive



Posted at 11:02:30 am by chatpolka
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Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Turning Point

Had sent Dad for his medical review yesterday,
The review given by the Doc sound good.
Look like this could be the turning point for Dad's recovery.
As long as his healing is progressing positively.
I believe in no time the wound would be completely healed.
That will pose the next stage of recovery.

Hope not to wait too long.
So that it will be easy on everyone.

Posted at 2:03:35 am by chatpolka
Bombard me with....[Comment]  

Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Congratulation.... Mike & Sherilyn

Last night received a message from Sherilyn about their New Born.
Am really glad and most happy for them.
They have been waiting for this moment.

Mike & Sherilyn -
Congratulation to both of you.
All the best to your New Born - Xavier.
He will be your gem and precious.
He will grow up to be a Great Kid.

NOTE:
Thousand apology.
So sorry that I could not share the joy and celebration
with you both on Xavier's month old.
Will make up for it some other time when we can next meet.


Posted at 10:58:54 am by chatpolka
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Monday, October 29, 2007
Inflation

Went for breakfast at the hawker centre.
While having my food.
Happen to overheard the market aunties and uncles complaints.
They are complaining the rise of daily produces.
Everything seems to be on the rise and the pay just stay stagnant.
Now $1 just buy nothing.
Flour prices on the rise, eggs on the rise, foodstuff on the rise,......
Nothing seems not to be on the rise.

The hawkers are increasing prices too.
Now you don't see $2 on the price list for some.
Minimum price $2.50 or $3.00.
How not to complain about the inflation?
Living standard is just getting out of hand these days.
Look like I also have to start my strict budgeting soon.
Otherwise how to survive such high inflation.

The authories have been saying rise 1 cents, 2 cents...
Won't hurt much.
But do an accummulation for everything and by months and years.
Then you will see how much effects on our pocket.
Bus fares rises, MRT fares rises, Oil price rises, Housing rental rises,....
Every rise is not just 1 cent or 2 cents...
It's in term of 10 cents or even more.

Please tell me what's not on the rise?



Posted at 12:04:02 pm by chatpolka
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Monday, October 08, 2007
I'm Back

Haven't been blogging for a while.
Been very busy with many many things.
Will be in and out of blogging for a while till things settle down.

Been sick for a while too.
Was down with running nose and sore-throat for a while.
Running nose got better but now down with my deadly cough.
This is one that I hated most.
'Cos it's gonna take me weeks or months to recover.

All well at work for the moment.
But was back-stabbed once by a senior.
Shall not dwell on it.
As it's something that I did not do.
So will not explain myself to make things worst.
Just looking forward to year end for my long break.

Holiday....Holiday....Holiday....Holiday....Holiday....


Posted at 12:32:51 pm by chatpolka
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Sunday, September 23, 2007
Discharged

Dad was discharged a few days ago.
Now that he'll wheel-chaired bound.
A lot of things have to change.
First is the environment.
Furniture and his surrounding have to change to suit his movement.
Next is the dietary.
Been trying to get him to go on a healthy diet.
But still not showing much improvement in this area.
Insist that he goes on a light diet.
He still insist the maid to prepare heavy taste diet.
Like being more saltish etc.
Still complaining food taste bland when it's already saltish.
He would ask the maid for more soya sauce or seasoning.
Don't know how much more saltish he want to ruin his own health once more.

Just felt like telling him off once and for all.
And get out of that place.
I'm just loosing more of my patience.
Can understand his frustration of being wheel-chaired bound.
But who brought this upon him.
It's he himself.
Been telling him many many times but was turn on deaf ear.
Sometime he would just look blank into my face.
Pretending or just ignoring what I tried to tell him.
With him being obstinate and stubborn.
I'm getting very tired with this whole game.
Have been holding back many things that I can't pursue for his sake.
Probably it's time that I discharged myself???


Posted at 4:31:05 pm by chatpolka
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Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Ops Completed

The ops was completed in the early morning.
He's back to the ward.
According to the message from nurse to bro,
"Operation is successful."
Glad to hear the good new.

Was unable to visit him in the early morning.
Visited him during lunch hour.
Stepping in the ward already hearing his complaints,
"Why no one visited me this morning?"
"I was so painful and hungry this morning......" etc.
With so many complaints coming out of his mouth.
I would presume that he is much better now.

Just have to continue observing the condition,
To ensure no further deterioration or infection.


Posted at 9:17:13 pm by chatpolka
Comments (1)  

Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Doc's Call

Received Doc's calls from the hospital several time.
Picking up the call just increases my heart beat.
Not knowing what's coming but expecting miracle to happen.

Ultimately, no miracle seem to happen but more worries.
Dad's condition has worsen and in the life threatening border.
If nothing is done it will threaten his life.
If something is to be done then maybe miracle may happen.
Doc's advice is to do that something to create miracle.
Try to weigh the pro and con at this crucial moment seem illogical.
Only solution is to take the only chance and option left.
No pro or con can outweigh that option.

Only option is to operate and hoping the miracle to happen.
Of course the risk and worries can only be left behind.
Was worried that Dad will not agree to it.
As he was in a drowsy state since yesterday.
He manage to regain some sense and heed Doc's advice.
Doc will prepare him tonight for his op tomorrow.

Will be praying hard for the miracle to happen.

Posted at 12:20:56 am by chatpolka
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Monday, September 10, 2007
Getting Worst

Just came back from the hospital after admitting Dad.
He's down again.
This time round seem to be worst than any other time.
He's totally unable to stand or manoveur himself.
His voice is so feeble that I can hardly hear him.
Was shivering and trembling when he's send to the emergency ward.
This is the worst scenerio that I want to think of.
But this is happening now.
I know the consequences but still maintaining a positive outlook.
Praying hard that miracles will happen.

Will be another busy period for me and the family.
Just hope that I can conserve my energy to brave through this period.

Posted at 2:06:30 am by chatpolka
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